Wednesday, January 26, 2011


 #3: The dictionary atop your shelf has more than 200,000 words defined. Why don't you blow some dust off the cover and randomly pick out 10 words? Don't look at the meanings, just concentrate on the words. Write down your chosen words. Now, you're going to have fun creating meanings for those words. What do the words make you think of? What do you think they should mean?

elegise (n), an elephant dressed as something else, usually for the purpose of concealing its identity. The elegise wore thick, fully-body wigs on a regular basis to baffle the scientists in the region who were studying woolly mammoth fossils.

democratize (v), to remove all emos from an area. The party was successfully democratized when the DJ started to play Celine Dion.

homophone (n), a phone that experiences sexual and/or romantic attraction towards other phones of the same variety. The cell phone's parents were shocked to hear their son's admission that he refused to date landlines and was indeed a homophone.

capriote (n), an angry mob consisting entirely of headwear. There was a capriote outside of the college campus today when hundreds of mortarboards were carelessly thrown into the air by the graduating class.

halophyte (n), a battle that takes place in the popular videogame, Halo. No, honey, I can't come to dinner, I'm in the middle of a halophyte... ask me again next week.

banjaxed (v), having one's banjo stolen. The farmer's hired helpers went on strike after their boss banjaxed them.

calzone (n), slang term for California. The calzone is a mythical land on the west coast of the United States that operates on a set of fundamental principles that vary greatly from that of our own dimension.

radiopelvimetry (n), the insertion of a radio into one's pelvis. Because I lose every ipod I buy, I've been looking into radiopelvimetry.

ebullience (n), the state of mind in which one thinks they are a cow. After years of performing as a highly-skilled matador, Ricardo was finally forced to retire when he acquired an unfortunate case of ebullience and tried to headbutt his opponent in the ring.

lambertia (n), the tendency of a moving lamb to resist any changes in its motion.  We now know that Jesus was able to walk on water because of his natural lambertia.

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